{"product_id":"return-to-office-protein-farts-5","title":"RETURN TO OFFICE - PROTEIN FARTS","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eTHIS AIN’T JUST A TOTE—IT’S THE OFFICIAL “CHAD’S FARTS KILLED MY WILL TO LIVE” LUNCH HAULER FOR OPEN-PLAN SURVIVORS! Blasted with our screaming Rated One Star logo on BOTH SIDES of heavy-duty canvas that costs less than Chad’s monthly whey bill, this 18x18 rage carrier turns every brown-bag walk into a public indictment of RTO. Shove your real lunch (made at home for $3) while the dual-sided rage makes Chad back up six feet. If this tote doesn’t get you a personal bubble, we’ll tote hell’s protein powder—no questions asked! Load the rebellion. Haul the hate. Carry the One Star like the final boss who brought airtight containers and contempt!\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003eProduct features\u003cbr\u003e- 100% polyester durable medium-weight body (200 g\/m²)\u003cbr\u003e- Boxed corners for extra carrying space\u003cbr\u003e- Reinforced double-stitched handles for added strength\u003cbr\u003e- Non-woven laminated interior with seamless black inner stitching\u003cbr\u003e- 18 inches by 18 inches\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCare instructions\u003cbr\u003e- Remove all items from the bag before cleaning. Suggested to pretreat visible stains with stain remover. Mix warm water with laundry detergent and clean the bag with terry washcloth or a soft bristle brush. Let the bag air dry.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"18\" × 18'' \/ Black","offer_id":54126628634899,"sku":"12468139012381135306","price":28.77,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0987\/2300\/4691\/files\/9641240750029912592_2048.jpg?v=1778181836","url":"https:\/\/ratedonestar.com\/products\/return-to-office-protein-farts-5","provider":"Rated One Star","version":"1.0","type":"link"}